Taco Bell

So, I know this is a real estate publication, but hear me out, because I am pretty sure this week’s Wednesday WTF still counts as real estate related because we all have made a run to the border to heed the siren call of Taco Bell.

It’s quick, easy to find, and when you have exactly 15 minutes at best for lunch, need some wifi too, and don’t mind spending some time in a restroom later, it’s the thing to do.

So pause before you get jalapeno up in my face about the subject matter. Also, it’s about doorknobs, and all these houses have them. So there, boom, two ways it’s connected to real estate.

(more…)

really

The need for power washing aside, this Santa Ana, California, home seems fairly normal from the outside.

This week’s Wednesday WTF is a reader submission who says she really has questions about two things in this listing, which almost doesn’t qualify it for WTF status because typically, we are used to having so many questions.

really

So many. (more…)

Yes, yes, it looks normal. Act like you’ve been here before and keep reading.

So I want to say right away that we like Australia, as a concept. And as a country, it seems to have some pretty adventurous Realtors. But much like the U.S. Australia also has its share (apparently) of listings that are um, normal on the outside, and well, different on the inside.

And listen, we’ve already shown you an Aussie listing where you can watch your beloved take a poop while you (not a euphemism) chop broccoli in the kitchen.

But this listing in the Melbourne suburb of Coolaroo, it is just …

(more…)

Florida man

Photo courtesy Google Earth

Now, first, let me say that it is almost universally known that any story with a headline that starts with, “Florida man …” is going to be a doozy. There was even a social media game a month ago where you looked up the month and day of your birth along with the phrase “Florida man” on Google, just to see what headline you’d get.

For the record, I got, “FLORIDA MAN THROWS TOILET THROUGH SCHOOL BOARD BUILDING WINDOW IN ILLINOIS, IS ARRESTED SITTING ON ANOTHER.”

You should try this, by the way, and tell us in the comments what Google gave you.

At any rate, this week’s Wednesday WTF does indeed bear a headline that includes that key phrase, and yes, it is a real estate-related doozy. (more…)

electricityThe good news is this week’s Wednesday WTF is being written. The bad news is it’s being written from a hotel room next to a strip club because home base has no electricity.

You think I’m kidding, but Monday when we couldn’t find any restaurants open, my sweet innocent child said from the backseat, “Oh look, Mom! There’s a buffet at that place. If they’re open we can go have lunch.”

electricity

So yeah, that was a whole thing.

Anyway, we spent Sunday night believing Oncor when it said we would have electricity by 5 p.m. Then 6 p.m. Then 9 p.m., then WTF PM ARE YOU DOING OUT THERE? And we were all trying to be very zen about it. We spent time outside. We filled up the wading pool. We ate popsicles.

But around midnight, with all of us sleeping in separate beds because all of us needed to starfish for maximum circulation, it became clear that Oncor knew as much as we did about the electrical grid of the Dallas Metropolitan Statistical Area. (more…)

burglarSo, imagine this. You come home, and realize that your back door (which you shut) is open, and you realize someone — even a burglar — has been in your house.

Now, I’d like to think I’d be all Texan and ready to rumble, but let’s be honest, it would be more this:

than this:

And honestly, it would probably be more like this:

But imagine walking into your house, realizing someone had been inside it while you were gone, and then … (more…)

food

Editor’s Note: Because of a big, breaking story yesterday, our Wednesday WTF writer is, well, behind. Very. But she thought you’d enjoy this dip into the archives from a time when a reporter was very wrong about food.

Listen, this week’s Wednesday WTF was supposed to be about Oprah’s fancy new island but then something egregious happened that has left my normally unflappable self completely flapped.

You see, at 8 a.m. Tuesday, The Atlantic saw fit to publish a piece entitled, “What to Eat in the Texas Suburbs.” It also indicated it would be about fast food.  If you saw it, you probably (like me) thought, “Oh, good, they’re going to talk about some of the good fast-food dining in Texas suburbs, because this is the Atlantic and of course we’ll not be talking about something stupid like Taco Bell.”

I mean, sure I’ll cop to some inside-the-loop snobbery, but I do know that there is some good food to be had in the suburbs. Great food, even. I’ve eaten it. The suburbs of Texas doesn’t mean backwards yokels with outdoor plumbing — so I was just certain that I was about to settle into a piece that talked about some great mom-and-pop fast food establishments, and probably an obligatory Whataburger reference. (more…)

man caveIf you watch enough House Hunters on HGTV you can create a drinking game of it — take a shot every time someone says man cave. Chug a beer when someone says they hate the paint color. One kegstand when the couple announces they each want a style of house that is not at all compatible with the other, like a Victorian Brutalist with an open concept kitchen that is hidden from the great room and has vintage post-war appliances. Civil War.

Sorry, I got sidetracked there.

Anyway, the man cave is mentioned at least every other episode. In fact, there was one episode where the guy mentioned the man cave every two minutes. The fact that the Realtor didn’t shove him in an actual cave speaks volumes for the patience and professionalism of the craft of real estate sales.

I bring this up because a reader sent me a listing for this week that has a man cave. I mean it, we can’t call it a bonus room, or flex space, or a home theater, or any other euphemism. It is what it is, and what it is is a man cave. (more…)