Affordable in Rochester? Yes. Understandable? Not Even Close.

The first time I looked at the photos of this week’s Wednesday WTF home, I felt as though some big, hairy space alien had picked me up with their mind powers and shook me like a ragdoll. Then, they twirled me around like a street corner arrow advertising a new sub shop. Once their arms got tired, the big, hairy space alien sat me in an office chair and spun me around like a top. In a word, I was discombobulated.

This beauty is in Rochester, New York, and it is priced at $150,000. And they say there is an affordable housing shortage. You know my cardinal rule, if I see it then you have to see it. Brace!

Undoubtedly, your first instinct looking at this home’s facade is to get rid of the ivy. No, no. You do not want to do that. My theory is that it is the ivy that is holding the house together.

We need more ivy. Just to put your mind at ease, the middle part of the roof is not caved in. It just looks that way because you’ve been shook like a rag doll. I’m giggling to myself because I know what’s coming next.

Are you discombobulated yet?

Come on now, let’s give up the snaps to the stager. They absolutely nailed the placement of the dustpan. No need to straighten out the rug. We’re good, baby! I count at least five different types of flooring. Yes, I’m counting the subflooring.

So. Many. Hooks. I don’t know why. I also do not understand the portholes. Lastly, the ‘80s called and they want their boombox back. It’s nearly as big as the microwave.

Before we go upstairs, I have to point out the piano and the fireplace. 

I cannot look at the fireplace and the piano and not feel as though there is some ancient feud between the two. Here they are, in their old age, still giving each other the side eye, waiting for the other to show some weakness so they can strike. Or, it just may be this nutball house. I can’t be sure.

Those are the same handrails that I used to hang on to at the roller skating rink. Also, you would think that beams that are so big would make me feel better about the structural integrity, but alas. Lastly, it’s not every day you see ‘Ol Sparky the electric chair in a house, but this is Rochester after all. The homeowners are giving you options. Discombobulated yet?

Ah yes, the bathroom is the only thing that makes perfect sense. The “Flames of Hell” shower curtain for panache. The creepy doll reflection in the mirror is simply a bonus. Okay, one more.

I dare say, ET over on the right has absolutely gone home, and I do not care how many times you say Beetlejuice, he will not appear in this room, on this rug, or in this house.

Beetlejuice knows. He doesn’t want to be discombobulated.

Located in Rochester, New York, this home is listed for $150,000.