Goths Rejoice: Ghoulish Buyers Have Met Their Match With This Maryland Listing

Sometimes when I look through the photos of listings I cannot help but think , “I wonder if the people they work with know just how crazy they are? Do they act as insane in the grocery store as their house looks?” 

Before the internet came along, we would flippantly say, “They’re nuts.” but we never got confirmation. I now take great comfort in the fact that I, indeed, did not know the level of insanity that exists in this world. But then along came the internet and holy crap. 

Yeah, I am talking about the house featured in this week’s column. It is as though they went to the grim reaper and asked, “What do you have in the ghoul department? Extra ghoul please. How can up the ghoul factor for my living room?”

Now you folks know the rules, if I see something completely and totally whackidoo then you have to see it too. I cannot be alone in this. I have been writing this column for more than a year now so you should know we do have that kind of relationship.

For starters, the listing has 82 photos. Yeah, you read that right, 82. So this is not just like one or two photos and the rest are okay. These are 82 nut job pictures. Oh, and these photos were not taken in black and white just so you know. Okay, enough talking.

This house is located at 228 Townsend Avenue, Baltimore, Maryland. It has one bedroom, one bathroom and is a little more than 1,500 square feet. It was listed for $276K and sold for $245K. If you look closely you can see the homes on either side making a point to stay as far away as possible.

Okay, so they are big Raiders fans. They are going with a black and silver theme. Then you catch the photo on the wall. “Hey, is that a picture of a big guillotine?” Why yes, yes it is.

Ruh-roh.

Look on the brightside, if you time your fall just right, you can land right in or at least close to the coffin because there is no handrail on that side of the staircase.

There is nothing I can say to prepare you for the bedroom.

I mean really, I got nothing.

The red pillow is how I knew these were not simply black and white photos. Let me be more specific: the red, leather pillow, located on the church pew, next to the bed which is encircled in mirrors, is how I knew these were not black and white pictures.

I will be honest, I was reeling by this point. So I moved on to the photos of the backyard.

RIP indeed and the cross headstone is blocking the driveway.

The tailgate of the hearse is a nice touch.

Now, of all 82 photos there was one I think we could all relate to and are in dire need of now that this column is wrapping up. I have a feeling you will agree with me.

To see more photos go here.