“McMansion Hell” Blog Picks Flower Mound Home for Dank McMansion of the Week

4504 Tour 18 FM ext

Surely you have read the blog, “McMansion Hell”? If not, here you go. The author (who must be an architect) says

McMansion Hell aims to educate the masses about architectural concepts, urban planning, environmentalism and history by making examples out of the places we love to hate the most: the suburbs.

By alternating comedy-oriented takedowns of individual houses with weekly informative essays about urbanism, architecture, sociology, and interior design, McMansionHell hopes to open readers’ eyes to the world around them, and inspire them to make it a better one.

We understand. (We also think he’s kind of snarky.) But we also hope McMansion Hell doesn’t look too closely at North Texas. The home they chose to rip apart recently is 4504 Tour 18 Drive in Flower Mound for $829,900. It’s listed with Jim Streigel of Coldwell Banker. Listing date: 3/16/2016. It was built in 1994, is on 2 acres in a golf course community, and the price has already been reduced to $829,000 from $939,900. Wow. High hopes.

But really, honestly, what does a real estate agent do with stuff like this???4504 Tour 18 doorway

Here’s what the author had to say about Flower Mound:

a surprisingly euphemistic name for a small town in a heavily conservative state.

Obviously, the builders took the name of the town to heart when designing this house – and not the “Flower” part either.

Ouch. Well here is the rest of the house. I found one very pretty room, done up in black toile. The rest of the house is so stuffed with heavy furniture that matches the copious crown moldings I kind of needed to go get fresh air.

I post this not to be mean, because obviously this home has people who love it and it is someone’s home, no matter how much of a “mound” it is. There are some very pretty parts. I post it because I truly want your opinion: what would you do with a listing like this to make it more appealing?

That kitchen is pretty dated. Should the cabinets be resurfaced? How about that ancient sink? The counters? Would changing out some light fixtures help? New flooring in the foyer? Should the draperies go? (So biased here, not a drapery gal…) But I kind of like the master closet (trying very hard to be positive).

Help!4504 Tour 18 FM foyer 4504 Tour 18 FM LR 4504 Tour 18 FM high 4505 Tour 18 FM DR 4504 Tour 18 FM study 4504 Tour 18 FM family 4504 Tour 18 FM kitchen1 4504 Tour 18 FM kitchen 2 4504 Tour 18 FM master 4504 Tour 18 FM master bath 4504 Tour 18 FM pretty room 4504 Tour 18 master closet

 

 

11 Comment

  • A lottery ticket winner will make this their new estate

  • The agent could suggest a review of the homeowners insurance policy and hire an arson
    Ouch!

  • Carpet and a “decontamination room shower” in the master bath?

  • Some houses are the land that time forgot and this is an example. The owners don’t understand because this is likely their dream home and was once a showplace. This is typical of that era. What’s wrong is the curtains, carpet, wallpaper, light fixtures, plumbing and bath fixtures and outdated kitchen. All out dated and in need of modernization. Their furniture gives off a dated impression also and the heavy wood paneling has gone out of style. Buyers walk into a house and often get stuck with all the “need fixings” especially if the price is high. Many if not most of today’s buyers want move in ready and contemporary styling. A house that has been kept in tip top shape physically is such a bonus but if it’s granny inside, many see it as a no. Wonder how old a/c and water heater are? Does it have decent windows or are they in bad shape? It appears to have a lot of natural light and large rooms.

  • If you could just convert those second-story multi-window features into full-scale turrets, it would solve everything.

  • What I see is a home priced at $130 per square foot in a market where if the home had been completely updated, would likely go for much more. The criticism I believe is unfair, given the property seems to be priced based on the condition. Take a look at 4605 on the same street, priced at $195 per square foot.

    • mm

      Agree. We are not trying to be rude (maybe Mr. MaMansions From Hell is) we just honestly want to know what you can do to enhance the marketability of the home. It never ceases to amaze me how elite some people can be about aesthetics without acknowledging that not every citizen can AFFORD aesthetics. This may be a great home at the price… but it is not moving.

  • Well the first thing they should have done is call a professional stager and at least get a consultation. I’m always stunned when a seller and Realtor would rather lower a price than at least get a consultation. Why? It costs SO little to stage compared with a 110 THOUSAND DOLLAR REDUCTION!

    Step 1.
    Take down the curtains all of them.
    Take down the personal artwork.
    Put updated linens on the beds.( That Toile is from 1985).
    Get rid of the fake plants.
    Paint over any and all gold trim lines on fireplace , ceiling insets, front door.

    Step 2.
    Paint the kitchen cabinets and replace the red granite with quartz.
    Update the light fixtures, no one likes crystal chandeliers any longer ESPECIALLY IN A BATHROOM!
    Get rid of the carpet in the master bathroom. Carpet? Really? NO NO NO.
    Paint the wood cabinets in the master and upgrade the countertops.
    Add an updated mirror in the bathroom( Honestly you can get this at Home Depot).

    Step 3
    Store the furniture, it’s wildly out of date.
    Hire a stager and rent furniture.
    Doing ALL of this would not cost anywhere NEAR a 110 K price reduction!

    • I agree with all of Karen Eubank’s comments. The house is really dated, but has potential. Clearly most people cannot see past this kind of stuff to the real potential, so you have to do it for them. It probably seemed overwhelming to them, so they are pricing it “as is,” but that doesn’t always work.

  • I’ve seen a lot worst decorated homes Preston Hollow with 1.5M price tag

    • There is no correlation between wealth and taste. As one of my favorite TV shows said, “If you want to know what God thinks of money, look at who s/he gives it to.” 🙂 (thanks to Audrey fforbes-Hamilton)