Calling All Witches: Your She Shed Awaits

For the record, I want it noted that I have filed the first fall themed column of 2022 at CandysDirt.com. 

You see, our awesome publisher offered a $25K bonus to the first writer that wrote a fall themed column. Thanks to the wonderful witches that are selling their home in Des Plaines, Illinois, yours truly will be collecting that bonus. 

Oh yeah baby, that is me taking my old man out on the town. Momma’s bringing home the bacon!

Now, you were probably blown away by the incredible alliteration of “wonderful witches” and you are now thinking, “Wait, what? How do you know it’s witches selling the house?”

Silly, everyone knows that witches love earthy tones, fireplaces, and living in the woods. This house has all three and more. It does not take a rocket scientist to figure out that witches are selling this house.

This delightful little home is located at 390 N East River Road, Des Plaines, Illinois. 

It has five bedrooms, four-and-a-half bathrooms, and is a little over 8,500 square feet. It sits on four acres, which backs up to the Kloempken Prairie Forest Preserve. The owners are asking $850K.

I know, I know, you are already on the phone to your girlfriends, I mean coven, to let them know you have the perfect she shed for your getaways.

There you go, that is the spirit. 

You cannot get more earthy than brown wood paneling and dead trees in your house. 

You do not even have to walk out into the preserve to pick out the perfect design for your new broomstick of the season. You could just snap off a branch and get to work.

Look at all the space in this room and there is even a fireplace where you can throw the discarded twigs and leaves that you do not want.

The kitchen is fabulous. 

You have the earthy tones, a fireplace accessible on two sides, and two massive whiteboards. 

Witches are known for being highly organized. They use the whiteboards to keep track of their running grocery list as well as their recipes for candy and treats, baking children who are lost in the woods, their brew, and so much more.

Speaking of brew …

You can clearly see this is where the witches kept their cauldron.

Apparently, they had a little too much to drink one night and things got out of hand, one thing led to another, badda boom, badda bing, you will have to repair the ceiling but you can see that the floor can take a licking and keep on ticking.

So there you have it, my peoples, the first CandysDirt.com fall-themed column.

Candy, I will gladly accept that $25K bonus in cash or check!

For more photos go here.