3715 Oriole: "Dont Show and Then Complain of the Mess. Were telling You Up Front – – This House is a Mess"
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You know my favorite saying in real estate — “you cannot make this $#@T up!”
Well, here is but one more example. Honestly, I am torn between thinking this agent is the freshest thing to hit real estate since the lockbox or wondering if she is a Real Estate num nuts. I would love to get this before the eyes of the folks at Inman’s Real Estate Connect and hear what they say. Is this the new age of transparency? I mean, who actually puts these words down and spews them across the internet for a home they want to sell?
In any case, you be the judge.
Nice little house in the Bird Streets, 6715 Oriole. Shannon Estates. Original asking price was $250,000, now the place is listed for $320,000. Yeah, go figure that one. DCAD has it at $200,920 and in fair condition. 3000 square feet says the agent, 2598 says DCAD, .30 acre lot (90 by 140, DCAD), built in 1945, with three bedrooms, two baths. Then there is the property description — wow:
Property Description: This home is a mess inside. mattresses on the floor. interior rooms locked. Dont show and then complain of the mess. were telling you up front – – this house is a mess. All showing must be finished by 2 PM. No utilities are on in this house. Near Park Cities and Love Field. CSS will tell you the name of the person who is not to enter this property based on a legal order. Seller says I will NOT LOOK AT OFFERS LESS THAN THE LIST PRICE. |
Excludes: THIS HOUSE IS A MESS INSIDE. SOME ROOMS ARE LOCKED. EVERYONE IS TO BE OUT OF THE HOUSE NO LATER THAN 2 PM. |
Directions: Tollway to Mockingbird, West on Mockingbird, Left to Oriole house its on your left, next to a vacant corner lot. |
Private Remarks: DO NOT SHOW AND THEN COMPLAIN TO THE LISTING AGENT. WE ARE TELLING YOU UP FRONT THE HOME IS A MESS. SOME ROOMS ARE LOCKED. YOU MUST BE OUT BY 2 PM SELLER WILL NOT LOOK AT AN OFFER LESS THAN THE LIST PRICE. DONT SHOW AND THEN COMPLAIN. |
The listing agent is Diana Sifuentes. And this description is in the third party ags, too.
What if every agent said what they really felt when they wrote up listing descriptions:
“This house will probably make you need Prozac for the rest of your life. I honestly don’t know what the sellers are smoking — don’t look too closely for the hash pipes.”
“If this homeowner could be any cheaper, he’d figure out a way to take the air in the refrigerator with him.”
“Please excuse the mine-field of tchotchkes and family photos. And don’t tell me the house is too “personalized”. You try dealing with Jabba the Hutt and her 50 years of “priceless” antiquities, including that lovely shag carpet that is hiding every germ known to mankind…”
Now you’ve got me started… don’t read and then complain!
this is funny stuff.. Candy you need your own Show.. nation wide.. love it.
this is funny stuff.. Candy you need your own Show.. nation wide.. love it.
That's creepy. What happens when the clock chimes at 2? Are those doors unlocked and the freaks come out? Yikes!
The agent also forgot to list the exclusions: Meth Lab equipment not included
That's creepy. What happens when the clock chimes at 2? Are those doors unlocked and the freaks come out? Yikes!
The agent also forgot to list the exclusions: Meth Lab equipment not included
I would have "flew the coop" this house is for the birds!
I would have "flew the coop" this house is for the birds!
Well, the "code version" of that script is "this is a property you can make your own. The buyer must have vision" LOL!
Well, the "code version" of that script is "this is a property you can make your own. The buyer must have vision" LOL!
Must say this is one persistent agent to have kept a listing like this for so long.
Must say this is one persistent agent to have kept a listing like this for so long.
Follow up with broker coming soon!
Follow up with broker coming soon!
[…] you know, I kind of sort of liked what the agents did on 6715 Oriole, what I am now calling our “Don’t Complain House”. It reminded me of that scene in the old movie “Broadcast News”, where the anchor yells […]
[…] you know, I kind of sort of liked what the agents did on 6715 Oriole, what I am now calling our “Don’t Complain House”. It reminded me of that scene in the old movie “Broadcast News”, where the anchor yells […]
I saw that listing when it came onto the market… I wanted to see it just 'cause. But how can you buy it with certain interior rooms locked?
I saw that listing when it came onto the market… I wanted to see it just 'cause. But how can you buy it with certain interior rooms locked?
We need a new saying here on CandysDirt, a code word for us: DON'T COMPLAIN!
We need a new saying here on CandysDirt, a code word for us: DON'T COMPLAIN!
OK, here's one from me, as discreetly worded as I can muster: "Priced with the recognition that a buyer will want to make improvements."
OK, here's one from me, as discreetly worded as I can muster: "Priced with the recognition that a buyer will want to make improvements."
So where are the interior pics???? I would love to see that!
So where are the interior pics???? I would love to see that!
Yeah … sale the sizzle not the steak … and please,
don't complain!
Yeah … sale the sizzle not the steak … and please,
don't complain!
Oh my gosh!! That is some kind of marketing! However, I would not dream of taking a client to this property, especially since they make it clear the seller is non-negotiable! It is saying to me…..Your client REALLY does not want this house!
Oh my gosh!! That is some kind of marketing! However, I would not dream of taking a client to this property, especially since they make it clear the seller is non-negotiable! It is saying to me…..Your client REALLY does not want this house!
I don't think I would ever publish those kinds of remarks in public. I would be upfront about the condition of the property in private remarks and with the showing service. I had a short sale listing in a neighborhood of $450k homes, My listing was priced at $375k and the rationale was posted in private remarks. Despite all of this, I still got nasty feedback about why the home was not updated. The answer is easy. If it was updated, it would be listed much higher. Since it's a short sale, it's unlikely that the seller has the funds to do any updating.
I don't think I would ever publish those kinds of remarks in public. I would be upfront about the condition of the property in private remarks and with the showing service. I had a short sale listing in a neighborhood of $450k homes, My listing was priced at $375k and the rationale was posted in private remarks. Despite all of this, I still got nasty feedback about why the home was not updated. The answer is easy. If it was updated, it would be listed much higher. Since it's a short sale, it's unlikely that the seller has the funds to do any updating.
She must have used the Robo Descriptor 9000 – MLS Description Generator to produce such a winning description like this. See how it describes your house. http://www.reallyrottenrealty.com/blog/robo-descriptor-9000-mls-description-generator/
Hi Bill, how are you? Miss you! We need to get together!
She must have used the Robo Descriptor 9000 – MLS Description Generator to produce such a winning description like this. See how it describes your house. http://www.reallyrottenrealty.com/blog/robo-descriptor-9000-mls-description-generator/
Hi Bill, how are you? Miss you! We need to get together!
I once went on a listing appointment years ago in a rural area where the owners asked if they had to disclose that there "now incarcerated" son had once manufactured meth on the property. My first advertising thought was "value in the land 6 inches below the top soil." I wished them well…..
I once went on a listing appointment years ago in a rural area where the owners asked if they had to disclose that there "now incarcerated" son had once manufactured meth on the property. My first advertising thought was "value in the land 6 inches below the top soil." I wished them well…..
I'm looking through my list of clients to see who I have for that home, not. So funny, good representation for the seller.
I'm looking through my list of clients to see who I have for that home, not. So funny, good representation for the seller.
this was the best!! I cannot believe this happened….and in Dallas!
this was the best!! I cannot believe this happened….and in Dallas!